I brushed off her inquiries and told her that he just had issues and I didn’t know why. In the hours of the waiting room, I hoped that she wouldn’t ask for details as to why I was stabbed. It also happened to be her 30th birthday, which we spent in the emergency room. I strategized ways to tell her as little as possible while also not inviting any further questions. I nervously called my mom and told her that I was feeling ok but that some guy stabbed me in the head with a pencil. She confirmed my fears and told me to go to the emergency room. The fear in his face worried me and he told me that because I was bleeding so much, I should go to the nurse. I asked my fellow tuba-player sitting next to me to look at it. I thought I could just take care of it on my own and no one would have to find out about it. It was during lunch and I only had one more class left, which was band. My first inclination was to not tell anyone because I knew it would come to light that I was being harassed for being perceived to be gay. Then one day, during one of our almost daily scuffles, Daniel - who was at least half a foot taller than me - stabbed me in the head with a pencil. Kicks and punches, nothing I couldn’t fend off.
The verbal threats eventually escalated to physical violence. They teased me and even made a Myspace page about me being a faggot. It was my imagined community at a time in my life where I had none.Ī few guys in my middle school thought I was too gay to like punk. Punk music and its rich history, spanning decades and transporting me to different cities like London and New York, became my haven. Being labeled the “gay kid,” in sixth grade made me a social pariah. I started with The Ramones, which instantly became my favorite, before moving to more hardcore bands like The Unseen or Charged GBH. In seventh grade, I fell in love with punk music. Before I was able to be curious about my crushes on other boys, I trained my brain to stop before ever going there. I didn’t know what it meant, but the scrutiny around my mannerisms taught me that it was wrong. I was 11 when people started calling me gay. So if you’re looking for more wholesome queer goodness, we’ve got you sorted.I never came out to anyone - and the idea of coming out has always been foreign to me.
Ultimately, Heartstopper shouldn’t be where your viewing starts and ends. On Twitter, people have been sharing their ‘ My Heartstopper’ equivalents – characters that, intentionally or not, provided LGBTQ+ visibility for them when growing up. Such a statement discredits the many shows and movies preceding Heartstopper that have handled their queer coming-of-age stories with similar levels of sensitivity. Some have described Heartstopper as the first of its kind. And while it’s a rarity, it’s not the only uplifting tale of being young and queer available. There’s no denying Heartstopper is extremely lovely and that it will inevitably act as a source of validation for its Gen Z audience – with high schoolers played by appropriately-aged actors, most of whom also align with their character’s identity: a lesbian couple who are proud of the label (happy Lesbian Visibility Week!) a Black trans woman untethered from a traumatic subplot.